do temper your non-priapic man crushes please

As many of you know, some of the flowingest prose of our day comes in the form of letters to the editor. I was riveted by this celebration of the Steel City Roller Derby Demon Lady Punks, published in the P-G’s Weekend Feedback section (usually the source of the best letter-to-the-editor writing):

Oh, how they roll

Kudos to Bob Batz Jr. for his terrific (albeit tongue-in-cheek — slightly chauvinistic) piece “Hot Wheels” (Steel City Derby Demons put their bodies on the line for the thrill of the game, Jan. 18).

Having a professional roller derby league in town would considerably lessen the trauma if someday the Steelers are seen permanently jogging out of town with a Pirate under one arm and a Penguin under the other.

It’s time the distaff side of sports is given the publicity and fan support it deserves.

These female juggernauts are tougher than Shiite police officers who walk the night beat in a Sunni neighborhood.

The article’s mesmerizing action photographs transform these rippling athletes into a pride of powerful lionesses honed by the hunt, and I can’t wait to see the big can of whooping the Steel City Derby Demons are going to open on Jan. 27.

Women of Pittsburgh, unite and support your flat ring roller derby sisters while encouraging your boyfriends and spouses to temper their non-priapic man crushes on Pittsburgh’s male professional athletes long enough to give these “Hot Wheelers” a chance to prove their mettle.

Xena and Gabrielle were the peers of Hercules and Iolaus; the Steel City Derby Demons will eventually rival the Steelers.

Robert Biller

Fombell

The fact that the author is “Robert Biller of Fombell” is just the icing on the cake — that name has sort of a Dr. Seuss quality, or at least a Shel Silverstein quality. Or perhaps it sounds like someone who should be listed in the litany of the saints, between St. Robert Bellarmine and Sts. Cosmos & Damian.

I hope that brightened your day as it did mine.